"Friendor" E-PIC Sessions!

There is one thing I am not ashamed to admit about my wedding planning thus far: I am not afraid to jump through hoops to save money on virtually ALL aspects of my wedding. Well, duh, you say. But no, really. I remember a month after being engaged Matt and I sat down and made a list of the different aspects of the wedding. I immediately began writing names of friends and family down next to each category. Photographer? My cousin is a  professional photographer, check. Flowers? I have many family members with big gardens and I know an organic farm that will do it for cheap, check. Cake? My best friend from Korea makes ridiculous cakes (for free!), check. Paper products? Another friend here in Korea is a graphic designer, check. There are so many aspects of this wedding that are coming together awesomely and CHEAPLY because of the wonderful people I hold close in my life. Score.

As far as the E-Pics go, Matt has a good buddy here in Korea that takes Tae-kwon-do with him that is an amateur photographer and happily agreed to take our engagement pictures. Not only did he agree, and we didn't have one engagement pic session, we had TWO. This kid is awesome.And did I mention we paid him the cost for dinner for two and gas? That's it :)

The first session we decided would be a bit more formal. We went to one of our favorite temples in Korea, just 35 minutes away from Daejeon: Gapsa:

NOTE: these pictures are not the originals, so the quality isn't the best.

Gapsa Temple

 And the next day, we dressed more casual and headed to Hanbat Botanical Gardens, which is just a 10 minute walk from our apartment:

I love you in English and Korean

Especially for engagement pics I highly recommend either getting a free shoot from your wedding photographer or asking a friend or family member! We loved how ours came out :)

Reception Venue Details

One of the easiest decisions Matt and I have made thus far is where to have the reception after our church ceremony.

Because we didn't have much of a choice for the time of year (re:August), we knew right off that we wanted to be outside. After toying with just a few other ideas, Bradbury Mountain clicked for both of us. It's where Matt proposed to me, and after realizing that the field at the entrance to the park was plenty big enough for a tent, we did a happy dance and emailed the park rangers for more info.

We were a little worried at first that being a state park they wouldn't allow the reception we wanted, but not only did the head park ranger agree, he is super excited to host! Apparently there hasn't been a  wedding reception at the park for quite some time, possibly decades. It's cool thinking that our venue is unique, even though everyone within a 30 mile radius of the mountain knows it quite well.

The best part of this whole thing is that it's FREE. Well, not entirely free. They're not charging us anything to use the space, but of course we DO have to pay for the tent rental, as well as the tables and chairs etc. Besides that, everyone that uses the park has to pay a small fee ($3.00) and so we will pay for everyone beforehand. It ends up being MUCH cheaper than anything else in the area, which is AWESOME. Considering we are paying for the wedding ourselves, having a free (gorgeous) space to use was crucial in the budget planning.

If I have any advice for brides, it's to check out state parks! Or any kind of public park for that matter. If you don't care too much about other people using the space, it can be worth it, especially if you're on a tight budget but don't have a big enough backyard. The ONLY problem (which I don't consider a real problem) is that there is no alcohol allowed in most parks. This might be a huge issue for some people, but Matt and I were actually relieved. I'll talk more later about the partying aspect of the reception.

On to the photos. The great thing about having a 19 month engagement is that we got to celebrate a "preversary" on our wedding date this past August. My mom, being the rock star that she is, went to the mountain and took a bunch of photos for us:

the path leading to the field

The field. In the far background you can make out a net which we'll use for badminton

This is most likely where the tent will go

Entering the field

The park is bordered by old stone walls

part of the trail

The Skinny

After repeating this mantra day in and day out for the past 6 months, one day I decided to post it in big letters above my desk as a reminder:

I'm going to be a beautiful bride.

And SO ARE YOU! Seriously, people. Diet, or don't. Exercise, or don't. Center goals around buff arms and rock hard abs, or don't.  As my friends and I always like to say "peeps do what peeps do" (peeps=people for those of you who haven't had your coffee yet!). When you get engaged and become a bride-to-be, it's crucial not to compare yourself to others or judge other people for their decisions. Regardless, you are going to be beautiful, no questions asked.



As for me, this long engagement has proven difficult on my exercise and diet scheme. I am really good for a few months, then I go on vacation and return to a busy schedule and slip out of routine. Then I get back into it only to have something else come up. Heck, wouldn't it be nice to be engaged for like, 5 months so you could just bust out some awesomeness before having a chance to slack?


While I am in no way complaining, I do find it a bit difficult to diet here in Korea. At home there are many opportunities to eat poorly, but there are also a plethora of healthy foods at your fingertips. Not only are there a variety of whole grain products and produce, there are also low fat and fat free versions of foods. In Korea there are ZERO low-fat/no-fat products. ZIP. Okay, there is skim milk, I lied. But I don't drink milk, soooooo crap.

When I am on a fitness kick, this is how I am successful (sans health bars, whole grain pita bread, low fat dressings etc):


1.Turbo Fire. This program is freakin' INTENSE. When I stick to the schedule I burn inches like you wouldn't believe. Seriously. Try it.

This program will rock your socks.

2. Chicken and veggies: One thing Korea does well is fresh produce. While there is not the variety, it's sold everywhere (most conveniently on the street corners for cheap). Chicken, while not that affordable, can be purchased in large quantities at Costco (God bless you, Costco). So, pair the two together and that's what I eat.

If you think they sell brown rice anywhere in this country, think again.

3. Walking: There is a river 5 minutes from my house with a paved walk and that's what I do, I walk it.

the Gapcheon River

4.Kimchi: Koreans say that rice is power and kimchi is health. I'm not quite sure how powerful eating white rice is for your diet, but kimchi is packed with fiber and it's everywhere, so why not.

MM MM good.

What are you doing (or not doing) to get ready for the big day?

Sisterhood of the Traveling Dress

Let’s get this over with straight up: I am buying  a wedding dress without ever trying it on. Actually, as I mentioned in a previous post, I have only tried on ONE dress since being engaged.

Well, Dani, don’t Koreans get married? Yes, of course they do. Can’t you try on dresses in Korea? The answer is simply, no. Have you ever seen a Korean woman? 99.9% of them are the size of one of my thighs, no joke! I have a hard enough time trying to find shirts large enough for my chest, let alone pants that fit my hips, let alone a wedding dress! Korea is one of the slimmest countries in the world, with just over 3% of the population obese. This is changing (with the spread of western fast food chains and Pizza Huts), but still. You are lucky if you can find a pant size in this country above an 8, most stores don’t carry anything larger than a 6. 

This leaves me (a size 12-14) in quite a predicament. Do I leave one of the most important decisions of my wedding day to the three weeks before the wedding? Heck no. 

Enter my solution: Vietnam.

After scouring the internet for weeks, I finally found a small wedding boutique in Ho Chi Minh City that is making my dress. The co-owner, Quyen, is FANTASTIC and spends half of her time living in Rhode Island and the other half in Vietnam. Her sister runs the operation when she’s not there. We’ve been talking for the past 6 months about the dress, and I am happy to say that I JUST put the order in to have it made last week!

Dani, are you friggin’ nuts? Have you gone bat-poop crazy? No, I haven’t. I actually feel REALLY good about my decision. Like I said, I am a tomboy and as such I was never swayed one way or the other when it came to dresses. I knew an A-line dress would look the best on my figure, and so I spent some time researching fabrics and styles. Quyen came up with some sketches and BAM! Dress decided. 

The best part of this whole situation is that my mother will be flying to Vietnam to meet me in January! The two of us are going to spend a week getting adjustments made and enjoying southern Vietnam. After that, we’ll head to Thailand to meet up with Matt and continue our vacation chillin’ on the beaches in southern Thailand. Am I super excited? YES. Almost 4  weeks to go before I try on my wedding dress!

My mom will take the dress back with her to the States and unfortunately I won’t see it again (only through Skype) until the end of July. Oh well, you can’t have it all! Flexibility is key when planning a wedding like the one we’re having. I am just so blessed to have found Quyen in Vietnam and for my mother to make the big trip (by herself, on three different flights!) to be with me and support me. 

When Quyen sends me a picture of the dress I’ll be sure to post! :)

One Ring to Rule Them All!

Just joshin' with you. I apologize for all of the Lord of the Rings references, but I can't promise that I'll stop anytime soon, so you'll just have to deal :)

So one of the hardest jobs a guy will ever do (on his own) is pick out a ring for his fiance. Some girls are lucky and end up helping with the process, which must be a really awesome experience. Althought I did not help Matt choose the ring (I had no idea that he was going to propose), I did make it rather easy for him.

Bottom line, I am a tomboy at heart. My favorite articles of clothing are sweatshirts and yoga pants, and I will find any excuse to wear them. I value feeling comfortable over fashionable, and while I really envy and admire those who spend hours a day primping, I have tried numerous times and have miserably failed.

Because of my history of digging in to any project at hand (whether it's mucking stalls at the organic farm I worked at in Maine or wiping the school chalkboards off with my bare hands) Matt knew I needed a ring that reflected my rough personality. That, and I have ridiculously small chubby hands. Seriously, throughout middle and high school I was commonly referred to as "carnie hands" (Austin Powers line) and "panda paws" (never understood that one...I have first hand experience feeding pandas and their paws are anything but small).

Considering all factors, he decided on a simple white gold solitaire ring that wasn't extremely big and flashy and that wouldn't get caught on anything. I could not have been more pleased with his decision. For me, my ring is absolutely PERFECT. It doesn't look gaudy on my chubby finger, it's small but incredibly sparkly, and in simple terms, it looks like it just belongs.

Forever and Always. This is how we signed our love letters to each other in 7th grade!

Choosing THE Date.

The days after Matt proposed to me were a blur. Our families threw us an impromptu engagement party, I was given numerous bridal magazines (more than I could take back on the plane with me to Korea!) and I even tried on the one and only wedding dress I will try on until my actual one (more on that later). Along with being bombarded of all things marriage from family and friends, Matt and I found ourselves talking secretly behind closed doors about the wedding. 

Figuring out when to have the wedding proved a bit difficult, at least at first. The biggest reason why we chose to hash out the details in private is because the two of us had already talked a lot about signing on for a third year in Korea, and we had yet to tell our parents. It was hard enough explaining our reasoning to stay a second year, and we hadn’t even begun our second year yet, let alone a third! Our families automatically assumed that we’d be home the following February and would have the wedding sometime shortly after. Not wanting to disappoint, we came up with a plan.

Our plan involves staying a third year in Korea, planning the wedding from afar, and going home to get married during our summer vacation. Crazy? Yes. Doable? Definitely. We knew we weren’t the only ones on the planet that planned their weddings from abroad, we knew we could handle it. When it came down to it, choosing to have a long engagement (19 months) has allowed us to save for the wedding without worrying or going into debt, and gives us a lot of time to make it a true reflection of us. 

Sure, it’s going to be pretty stressful stepping off the plane exactly 3 weeks before “I do”, only having to get right back on a flight one week after the wedding. A month at home to do one of the most important things in our lives seems a little cheap. But we’re staying positive, telling ourselves that it will be more meaningful when time is of the essence. 

One good thing about only having a month to pull off a wedding is that we didn’t have to think too much about the date. We literally had two weekends to choose from. We ended up choosing the 18^th because we were engaged on January 18^th, eight eighteen has a nice ring to it (a nice sparkly one!), and my Jewish friends say that 18 is a really lucky number. Actually, 18 in Hebrew is Chai, which translates to “life”. Perfect.

Color Inspiration Board

Because of our 19 month long engagement, we’ve been able to take a lot of time to plan the feel and look of our wedding before having to commit to anything. One of our favorite things to do is to escape our cave of an apartment (first floor, barely any natural light), and spend hours pouring over wedding websites and planning various trips at a local coffee shop. We go so often to two different shops that the waitresses practically have our order in the computer by the time we walk up to the counter! One time when we went early one Sunday morning I had my hair down (which I RARELY ever do) and one of our favorite baristas in broken English told me she didn’t recognize me and thought Matt had come with another woman! Too funny. 

Anyways, it’s been more than 10 months since the proposal and we’ve finally decided on a color scheme for our big day, but it wasn’t easy.

Our first attempt at a color scheme:

Green and white

We loved the thought of keeping it simple and having green and white to blend in with the forest surrounding our reception sight.  But the more and more we thought about it, we wanted to incorporate more color.

Our second attempt:

Green and Yellow

We loved the way sunflowers looked against greens and white flowers. After a while though, I found myself thinking more and more about blue. I loved the way it looked in almost every picture I found online, and blue has always been my favorite color. Anyone who knows me knows that I naturally cling to blue, whether its clothing, home decorating or accessories. 

We fiddled with the idea of trying to do all THREE colors (blue, green and yellow), but it just ended up being too much. How would we coordinate it all so that the colors didn’t clash? How could we ensure the right shades of three different colors in every aspect of the wedding? It seemed too difficult. Besides, I didn’t like the look of it. 

So after much conversation, we decided on shades of blue and white:

 It's been blue for a while now, possibly more than half of our engagement. Once you choose a color scheme it feels like a huge weight off your shoulders! It was one of the hardest things to decide. Since choosing blue, we have dove head first into incorporating royal blue, light blue and white into all of our decoration ideas.